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My Journey with Gratitude, a lesson that started with my Dad

by delucaw1 in Tips

On November 11, 2018, I will have my gratitude anniversary.  It’s been 6 years where I find and post (5) things to be grateful for each day.  (I’ve used my personal Facebook page, and recently switched to my business page)  I teach (9) daily practices to my coaching clients, and gratitude is one of them.

Gratitude, a Dom DeLuca story.

My Dad, who is 77, was always telling me to ‘look up’.  He started his ‘look up’ campaign when I went to college in 1987.  He got more emphatic with his message to ‘look up’ when I started my career.  I remember thinking that was an odd thing to say. I never quite got it. And, I was too full of ego to ask for clarification. That was in 1991. Now, to appreciate this, you need a bit of context on Dad.  He was a high school music educator. Mr. DeLuca had an unparalleled work ethic and a demand for excellence. Dad tolerated nothing but respect. Most of his students revered him. Many feared him. His band program was widely known.  Wintersville High School marched in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade in 1973.  WHS won countless band competitions across North America during his 30 years at the helm. They even got selected as the guest band for the Hula Bowl over many college programs.  As his kid, I saw all of this. I internalized a lot of his examples. The downside was I thought in order to have academic and business success it must be at the expense of everything else. So, in 1987, when my Dad was much wiser to his ways, he was trying to help me “look up”.  Because, he didn’t want me to miss the things he did.

What is Gratitude?

Webster defines gratitude as the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.  Dr. Robert Emmons, one of the leading scientific experts on gratitude  talks about the second component of gratitude.   He explains, “we recognize that the sources of this goodness are outside of ourselves. … We acknowledge that other people—or even higher powers, if you’re of a spiritual mindset—gave us many gifts, big and small, to help us achieve the goodness in our lives.”  

Why practice Gratitude?

Gratitude fosters happiness.  It’s proven to be one of the most beneficial methods for increasing happiness  and life satisfaction.  Gratitude is an amplifier for positive emotions.  Like,  optimism, joy, pleasure and enthusiasm.  Biologically, gratitude helps reduce anxiety and depression.  It strengthens the immune system and lowers blood pressure.   Better sleep, resiliency and stronger relationships have been correlated with gratitude, as well. Consequently, gratitude makes us “pay it forward”:  Grateful people are more helpful, altruistic, and compassionate—in other words, more prosocial.

Gratitude in the workplace.

To extrapolate gratitude research to the workplace, grateful employees, firstly, are more engaged. Secondly, they have higher job satisfaction and are more resilient during challenging times.  Thirdly, they report feeling more connected to their workgroups, team-mates and community. As a result, all of these enhance employee productivity over time.  Hence, I would end our team meetings with an ‘Attitude of Gratitude’.

Gratitude, a Melissa DeLuca story.

Better late than never!  As I mentioned, I started a regular gratitude practice, ‘looking up’ nearly six years ago.  A special ‘thank you’ to Kelly Lombardo, who modeled the practice and got me started.  I have found many of the benefits that Dr. Emmons and associates have studied. The most amazing to me is resiliency. (I’ve written a blog series on Grit  that talks about resiliency.)  Being able to see the good during the challenge. Recognizing the positive even during a perceived ‘setback’ makes me smile.  Asking myself at the end of my day, ‘What was the good in this?’ or ‘What was good today?’ has been transformational.  I look back at my digital gratitude journal on Facebook during those difficult periods. I feel so accomplished that I genuinely found the diamond(s) in the rough.  The most recent example was making the decision to leave Google. The events surrounding that time were difficult. My learnings and insights, priceless! So, thanks Dad for encouraging me to ‘look up’!  In conclusion, Dr. Wayne Dyer was right when he said: “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

We only have a finite amount of time on this planet, and you can choose how to spend that time.

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Finally, I wish you much success on your career quest.  Yours in balance, learning, growth and harmony.  – Melissa DeLuca, CEO